Gawkman's Final Verdict!
OriginalityOverall: 2.5/5
Agree? Disagree? Impartial? Stupid? Comment on it!
First, some background on myself.
If you haven't noticed, my name is Gawkman. Do you know why my name is that? It's a play off the jargon term "gock", which is a hi-pitched rimshot achieved by getting the bead of the drumstick close to the rim while doing it. Guess what this pertains to? You guessed it- marching percussion (a.k.a. drumlines).
As Kayn put it, I was born to review this movie.
Oh, so much can be said about this movie. Where shall I start? The possibilities are endless, yet I feel I have only a specific length I can acheive before you get sick of reading my passionate rantings on the subject. So I shall do my best to make this a review, not a novel. Isn't that a novel idea? *Editors note: Gawkman has just been sacked by the Abhorrent Use of Puns Association (AUOPA)*
I suppose I should start by reviewing this as if I'm any Joe Shmoe, and know nothing about drumlines. Given that, I would say it's a mediocre movie about a kid who gets out of the slums with a scholarship for playing drums. He's tough. He's a survivor. And of course, he's black. That would probably account for the fact that we felt very white walking into the theater and sitting through previews for what have to be absolutely wretched movies. Our "hero" goes to college and is just so BAD that he doesn't wanna learn to be a team player. That's what I'd say if I was just a regular Joe Shmoe.
But I'm not a Joe-Shmoe that knows nothing of drumming. I... am GAWKMAN!
*cracks knuckles*
Okay, first of all, if someone wants to do a movie about drumlines, it's nice to at least do a little bit of research into drumlines for accuracy. I mean, c'mon- you wouldn't make a movie about black holes and throw aside the principles of the curvature of space for some mysterious force you call the "glaggo-shnorkey", would you? Well then again, maybe you would. The Glaggo-Shnorkey is quite a powerful force in the universe.
I guess you could say that as far as drumming on a drumline goes, this movie was far from accurate. From being judged and given a first class rating from seniors who are not close enough to actually hear what was just played to drum majors carrying oversized batons they stopped using in the 70's, this movie gets it wrong in more ways than you can imagine. Joebob and I laughed and reveled at the uncountable absurdities that only a drummer (or even pseudo-drummer) could appreciate. It was as if we were computer nerds in a land where people were impressed by graphics adapters with 256 colors and computer professionals who did assembly language were terrified of the thought of installing a program. I only wish I could remember everything, but here's a few of the numerous severe problems I found with the movie:
- If they gave you a scholarship for playing drums so you could major in music, don't you think someone would have noticed that you can't read music? Not only that, rudimental drumming is damn near impossible to learn without reading sheet music and understanding the complex rhythms and sticking patterns.
- Bands are not run like the marines. You will not be made to do pushups in the rain.
- Biga-diga burr is not a test of skill. It's a warm-up. On top of that, playing and not looking at the drum is not like learning to ride a unicycle or something.
- Even the most neurotic and obsessed of drummers do not carry drumsticks to their graduation.
- A televised marching band competition that awards the winning band $50,000? LMAO!
- Bands do not dance.
- Since when is junior-high level marching considered "difficult" in college bands?
- Since when are all college bands black?
- If everyone faces the direction they are marching (something they stopped doing almost 15 years ago) as opposed to always facing front, instruments will get quieter and louder sporatically. I guess not in movies!
- Assuming that there actually WAS a televised (*snicker*) contest awarding an exorbitant amount of money (*snicker, snicker*) and the bands tied, they would not determine the winner by their drumlines facing off and doing spontaneous cadences which apparently took no practice to do whatsoever.
- Snare drum music is usually denoted as just one straight note. Why did the computer that printed out what he played put in flats? SNARE DRUMS CAN'T CHANGE PITCH BECAUSE THEY ARE UN-PITCHED INSTRUMENTS!
- Two drummers (one who can barely read music) do quite an excellent job of listening to some funk and doing full-blown band arrangement from it without anyone's help (including but not limited to, an actual musician).
- In reallity, the antagonist drumline was much better than the "good guys" drumline (though they still weren't that good).
- If you're going to hire an actor to fake playing a drum, you might want to make sure they are actually playing the music and not obviously faking it.
- You don't use mallots on a snare drum.
- You DON'T use mallots on a snare drum.
- YOU DON'T USE MALLOTS ON A SNARE DRUM! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?
- NO!
- NO AGAIN!
- *beats head on seat in front of him*
Well, there you have it. If you play on a drumline, have played on a drumline, or pretty much know ANYTHING AT ALL about drumlines, I highly recommend you see this movie for B-movie laugh purposes. Although you may want to wait till it comes out on video. In the meantime, you can go here as a starting point if you want REAL drumline goodies.
Comments!
-PTHS drumline captain
Steve
First of all, I was born in Texas and lived there most of my life (and at least SPELL yankee right if yer gonna use that as an insult). Yes, I've seen black college bands like Grambling play. If you want to avoid the "black bands are cooler than white bands" debate, I can deal. It was innacurate on that account, too. When they dance on field, they don't play, it's impossible. Oh yeah, and the lines still use plastic heads =)
And they are dancing!
And they are playing!
At one!
And the same!
Time!
Of course it's possible.
If you're a musician.
a black college band Percussion Leader. Lil' Drumma Gurl
Yes? (oh - that's for Kayn by the way)
Peace.
1. the movie was indeed mediocre (but enjoyable).
2. However, it wasn't for the reasons you cited. You should check out as many HBCU band performances as possible, maybe even talk to a few HBCU drummers, and then see the movie again.
Obviously I don't see any white folks rallying for a "White History Month" or the "all-white channel" all white, all day and night.
you don't seem to have any idea of what you are talking about. Look for the Honda Classic Battle of the Bands. Many of the things in Drumline was not realistic. A freshman would of never been given the oppertunity to act as he did. But some of us do practice in the rain, some of can read as well as those of us who can't. If all you see is Florida States Band, for instance, you have missed FAMU. BCC, Jackson State, NC A&T, amongst many other HBCU bands work hard. Not to say anything negative about Corps Bands, but they are not the only bands in the world. As they say you say tomato and I say Tamato. As for Nick he does play drums, but not the style that is potrayed. You are right about the notation, being a composer that first caught my eye. But when you play something in you have to go back and have it retranslated into drum parts. It does appear crazy at first. Not, to discredit your comments, but there is a lack of knowledge on your part. If you want to say there was bad acting fine that is your opinion. Don't say that bands don't dance if you have never seen a black band, and yes there was a white band recorded for the movie. I don't know why they were left out, probably at most high stepping compitetions there are no white bands that come. Please no harm intended just explore more then the world you live in.
Why do you type like an actual horse, The Horse?
People, like Gawkman, aren't always going to like what you like. I don't forsee him changing his review to make you feel better. So, therefore, I urge Gawkman not to "set his ass up."
The Horse:
My review was about the movie "Drumline", not black college band culture. I never attacked you personally, yet you act as if I did and attacked ME personally. What does that say about you? You should take note of how Band-A-Holic stated their opinion... made me actually want to check out an HBCU band.
Oh, and I concede on the point that those were indeed NOT snare drums they were playing on, but single tom drums. So, you may mentally pretend that numbers 15-20 on the review now say this: "Single tenor drums are GAY!" Now, THAT WAS intended to piss you off.
Band-a-Holic said: I couldn't help but notice that most of the posts that claim the bands in "Drumline" weren't realistic are from high school bands. (lol) Please, please, please, if you are ever blessed with the chance to see an HBCU marching band (preferably FAMU's Marching 100) DO SO! The dancing while playing, the drum majors, everything is real and it will positively blow...you...away. For the record, Morris Brown whooped A&T's ass in the movie in my opinion. |
Band-A-Holic... I totally agree! In the film, I thought the Morris Brown drumline smeared 'em. But of course, hollywood can't have the antagonist win, can they?
anyways... does anybody got videos of their drumline?
robbie d said: gawkman sounds like a fagget who wont ever have a girlfriend in his life cause he cant get over a movie and how great it was... i mean like this isnt band camp... who cares if its "accurate" anyways... does anybody got videos of their drumline? |
Haha, yeah. Movies that are accurate are a waste of time - let's live in a fantasy world as much as possible!
Let me tell yuo something Mr. Gayman... you may think you know it all, but you clearly don't. I've been drumming (ON A LINE) since I was FIVE f***ing years old. You know NOTHING!!!!! I've been playing for over thirteen years, and competitavly for ten of those thirteen. Don't mess with me. If you go to a Grambling (a mostly black school with an ALL BLACK BAND! Gee Wiz... who'd'a thought?!) football game, and watch them at half time... you will see some of their simple cadences match quite nicely to the movie. I will agree that they were SIMPLE cadences, but when you only have a few months to teach an actor (who acctually playes a drum in the movie) to play a drum, simple is what you are going to have to live with.
These 70's battons in which you were speaking of, are still widely used in College bands. Especially down south.
In conclution... the imbisul that wrote his little piece about how shitty the movie was is nothing more than a big mouthed, dumb ass, show off, who knows SQUAT DIDDLY! Who gave you that name? YOU?! I'd love to drum with you sometime... I can promise you, you couldn't compete! My ability, and my style... are WAY OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE!!!!!
Getting trashed by people I've never met has been very enlightening... it becomes very clear how much people distort their perceptions of reality. Timble - you haven't a clue about anything about me, yet you pass personal character judgements on me based off a thrown-together review I wrote in 10 minutes. This makes you no better than the racist you claim that I am.
Anyone who insults him without knowing a single fact about him needs to get their facts straight before they start shooting their mouth off.
Gawkman should rewrite his review to this:
THIS MOVIE WAS THE BEST EVER BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE LIKED IT EVEN THOUGH I DID NOT SO I AM CHANGING IT SO THAT IT WILL AGREE WITH THE MINDLESS MASSES THANK YOU BLARF!
Alright, I've been keeping a list of all the names I have been called for sharing my only half-serious opinion, and here they are! Enjoy -
collidge boy - IGNERNT YANKEE - smart guy - jack ass - sweetie - jakeass - stupid - cow bell player - gawkman gayman - asswhole sucker - fagget - big mouthed, dumb ass, show off, who knows SQUAT DIDDLY - imbisul - DUMB ASS - Mr. Gayman - GAY MUHFUCKA
So "they'll" kick "our" ass because "they" dance and play at the same time?
You realize how stupid you sound?
Drumming king said: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT BANDS DONT DANCE. BANDS DO DANCE, MOSTLY ABOUT AFRICAN AMERICANS. PEOPLE DO DO THAT STUFF IN REAL LIFE. AND STOP HATEING ON RAP. I BET YOU JUST A WHITE ASS WITH MILITARY SYLE MARCHING. I BET I CAN PLAY BETTER THAN YOU. BICH DONT HATE BLACK MARCHING. |
Lol, so...they dance about african americans? I wasn't aware you could dance "ABOUT" something. Hmmph...news to me.
Also...I hate rap! Seriously how can something like that be considered good music when it's missing a key ingredient...A BANJO!
Seemingly the title 'Drumline' brings to minds images of actual percussion lines doing battle against each other. And maybe from certain vantage points, the actual 'drumming' may have been elementary, or rudimentary at best. But the intent of the movie was not to spotlight the finer points of proper percussioning. The movie dealt with the struggles endured by a young man being thrust into a situation where his natural talent gets called into play. He couldn't read music. But he learned. And he achieved. And although the storyline was depicted in a black college band, the lesson is quite universal. It could happen anywhere.
The one thing I've noticed reading these comments, is the lack of respect for the EFFORT involved in being in any particular band, style-wise. And while you may not like the 'style', appreciate the effort that goes into the preparationi and execution, of the artform we're all involved with. We all have a love for bands, and sepecifically--percussion. Respect the expression of the varying forms. Respect the work and dedication that goes in being on anybody's Drumline.
Respect that, even if you don't respect anything else....
We don't have to always get along, and we can disagree without being disagreeable....
I invite all of you to visit and join Marchingsport.com, where we discuss all facets of the Black College Marching Band Experience. Because respect is born of education and exposure....
You have been invitied....
Oh yeah, I marched for the Jackson State University Sonic Boom of the South. Old School. Squad 16. High-Altitude Mellophone...Humpin' and Stumpin'
Respect was given.....No, give it back...
holla at ya gurl!
1luv baby
jnat said: i love that movie "drum line" always will.thats my baby "NICK CANNON" i love him so much,y'all stop hating and shut the hell up.try to appreciate.Everything about that movie was hot and gooddddddddd!anyway what college was that? Thats a question i got.i wish i could see nick cannon face to face!i just admire everything about him!his looks,acts ,etc.anyway try and hook me up with a ticket to see him or something .let a sista know whats up with him and i want to know the college!(a&m what?). holla at ya gurl! 1luv baby |
"drum line" is hot! so is "NICK CANNON"
FUCK YOU AND YO LITTLE CORE STYLE SHIT...WHY DONT YOU TRYIN HANGIN WITH A REAL BAND SOMETIME!!(i.e. FAMU,BCC,Gramblin State)...check this shit out and try and tell me all that shit in the movie was fake...
http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=146
http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=115
http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=134
IM RICK JAMES BITCH!!
Lightly Toasted said: All yall need to listen good...this gawkman bitch is a ignant motha fucka...if he even tried to hang on a HBCU line he would be shammin so much that it wouldnt even be funny...This bitch dont know shit about nothin...all he knows about is his little core style marching(i would hardly call it marching they fuckin walk across the damn field) And for the over sized batons that they stopped using in the 70's Every HBCU in the "dirtay south" uses those along with a lot of high schools(i've even seen a middle school band with them)...and in the words of my drum major, "Gawkman...pack yo shit up and take ya ass home...dammit" FUCK YOU AND YO LITTLE CORE STYLE SHIT...WHY DONT YOU TRYIN HANGIN WITH A REAL BAND SOMETIME!!(i.e. FAMU,BCC,Gramblin State)...check this shit out and try and tell me all that shit in the movie was fake... http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=146 http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=115 http://www.showtimemag.com/forum/media/categories.php?cat_id=134 IM RICK JAMES BITCH!! |
Ah, swearing. Crutch of the ignorant :)
Gawkman...my hat's off to ya. More people have come to your site to bitch about your movie review than people who have actually wasted their $8 to see the movie.
BurlapBag said: scandalous. Gawkman...my hat's off to ya. More people have come to your site to bitch about your movie review than people who have actually wasted their $8 to see the movie. |
BurlapBag, I can't stop laughing at the truth of what you said. I had no idea when I wrote this that anyone would read or care at all, let alone respond with such... pure hate!
You need to get real 'cause that corps style marching ain't goin' to get it I've been marchin' for a while and trust me the best marchin' is black marchin'
Why do people keep correcting Gawkman on the "snare/mallet" issue when He's already admitted his mistake? Maybe people should read all of the comments before commenting themselves. Also, as has been stated SEVERAL times, Gawkman did not intend to be racist with his review. All bands in the south are NOT black. I play in my high schools marching band and we have white, black, hispanic, asian, you name it. And we dance. However, we are still a corp still marching band, and we do march, not walk. In fact, we play a cadence to get on the field. So before you bash other people or styles, read up.
Thank you and that is all.
(BTW, never seen the movie)
Let's remember - it's not the fact that both styles of marching all have their strengths and weaknesses, but it's the fact that skin pigment is what defines talent and true skill!
Stupid.
churchill snare drummer said: well! i think you guys need to understand everyone makes mistakes. gawkman was putting his word out there and to what ive read alot of what he said was pretty true. i found "drumline" to be knowwhere near authentic and CHS' percussion instructor (Mike Stevens."the Q Bible") doesnt do anything like the movie. so chill out, and relax...its just a movie |
Churchill, that's probably the wisest comment I've seen on this review. The man is JUST expressing his opinion of the movie, folks.
Oh, and this is totally outside of the drumline, it's EXTREMELY hard to actually play the tuba while jumping and spinning and whatever, but while they're doing this, they're perfectly playing. I guess it's a tuba thang, shawty, that I don't know about.
And, finally, I honestly don't think two marching bands would get in a fight because someone played on their snare, I don't think they'd play on someone else's snare in the first place. They make it seem like the Southern college bands take the competition personally, like they're the damn Nacy Carrigan's of Marching Band.
P.S. they did have a Corp Style band in the battle of the bands but they cut them because they didnt fit the style of marching.
HowBoutThemCowboys! said: Kayn, will you please stop ridin Gawkman's nuts. PLEASE!!!! Why don't you just get on your knees and suck his dick? |
Oh nos! We must have been gay all this time and didn't even know it! If random anonymous guy on the internet said it, it MUST be true!
A) They were performing in a stadium, if they turn around people would hear them on the other side.
B) If you have ever been on a drumline you would understand that you are to memorize MANY cadences. They used call offs for each cadence. It is believable.
C) They were not using "mallots" (mallets) on a snare drum fool. That is a tenor. It sounds like bass.
D) If it is a SOUTHERN band, and a SOUTHERN band competition, theres a very good chance that 90% of the audience and band is black.
E) If your band doesn't dance, they suck. Southern bands aren't about precission and complexity of the music. It is about playing something catchy and putting on a show. Trust me: A LOT of work goes into correography and timing with big band / southern style bands.
F) The Morris Brown College that played in the movie is a real college and a real band and those are all real cadences that they use.
D u m b a s s.
Brian said: You gotta be kidding me. WTF do you know? A) They were performing in a stadium, if they turn around people would hear them on the other side. B) If you have ever been on a drumline you would understand that you are to memorize MANY cadences. They used call offs for each cadence. It is believable. C) They were not using "mallots" (mallets) on a snare drum fool. That is a tenor. It sounds like bass. D) If it is a SOUTHERN band, and a SOUTHERN band competition, theres a very good chance that 90% of the audience and band is black. E) If your band doesn't dance, they suck. Southern bands aren't about precission and complexity of the music. It is about playing something catchy and putting on a show. Trust me: A LOT of work goes into correography and timing with big band / southern style bands. F) The Morris Brown College that played in the movie is a real college and a real band and those are all real cadences that they use. D u m b a s s. |
Brian - you sound ugly from your typing. And I'm right because it pisses you off and that's funny. And I'm going to continue to argue that they were mallots and that it was a snare because I can.
I'll give you that there was a lot of lazyness in Drum Line, but it dosent stop that movie from litein a fire in my soul.
1. So of the greates players in the world cant read (S. Wonder) and a drum is one of the simplest instraments to play by ear. Just gota feel the rythem.
2. Good bands are rum like the marines, I have dune pushup/laps/situps in the rain and make others do them.
5. I'v been in a televised band comp. where the prize was 20,000. This was in high school.
6. Bands that dont suck dance. You will notice when this happens that people stay in the stands at halftime and dont leave you show to get a hotdog like they do with *cough* whitebands *cough*
7. The band used to shoot for Drum Line was SWD, they are high school, I have seen them, they are a very good high school, but still a high school
8.Once again, all collage bands worth watching are black
9.In a good band, you look the direction that you march (barring speccial events), the way God intended.
10. Drumlines (along with every other section) always practice challenges for just such events. Tie or no tie.
11.Yah.... this is some of that laziness I was talking about, that was kinda sad.
12. That's what happens in movies, how do you think that James Bond made it this far.
13. I don't konw if I can make you see how A&T won the challenge, challenges are more that a test of skill. Really I odnt feal like explaining it, but they won mainly because they out classed them.
15. oh yah, those are called tenners, you hitem with mallets. ass
As an added bouus I thought I would add that my band was using a lot of stuff like EWF and several of those cadences before that movie ever came out.
I dont know why I cant make people understand that It is a bad thing when people leave a halftime to get some food......
gakboom digadigabidata boom pshhh
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Occasionally, movies about a specific topic based on a distorted Hollywood perception can sometimes be more entertaining than an actual good movie. This is one of those occasions.
-MHS Cymbal Section leader